Saturday, December 27, 2008

In more ways than one!

I just found out that my first love is engaged. The first thing I did was smile. Which is good news. It means in my heart I'm genuinely happy for him. Not fake happy; not wanna-be happy. But happy. After I smiled I got confused. I kept having these dreams with him in them. They weren't about him but he was just there. It was so weird. After I told my mom about it they stopped. Which is weird...for reasons too complicated to explain here. I got confused because every time I've learned he was with another girl than me I would get so overwealmed and cry. This is the first time I've not cried over him. I want to write so much more about this but I'm afraid to dwell on it too long. I'm afraid it won't stay this way. So I leave it here. Minimalist Heather (for once). Maybe I'm finally moving on.

God I hope so....

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